The Year That Was

It's insane to think that my third year of teaching is coming to an end so quickly. Sometimes it feels as though it was yesterday that I opened the door to my very own class for the first time. There are other days when I feel like I have been in there for 40 years. As I reflect (a task that teachers are trained to do) on this past year, I can safely say I have learned more in the past nine months than I have in my entire life. It was easily the hardest yet greatest school year so far. I'd like to take this opportunity to post the lessons taught to me in my third year of teaching.

1. You are never given more than you can handle.

I faced some new challenges this year that gave me a chance to see what I was really made of. Life decided to go a few rounds with me. I'll admit that it knocked me down quite a few times, but I made it through. I learned that I am capable of handling so much more than I thought I could. We all can. The tough times in life are meant to show us our true strength. We grow in times of trial. Just remember to always get back up when life knocks you down because you are never given more than you can handle.

2. Live inspired.

This year was the first time I made it mandatory to wake up each day with the mentality that I am the one in complete control of my attitude. I wanted to live inspired, and that is what I have done. The incredible part is that my life has changed. I am accomplishing more than I ever thought possible because I am embracing my talents and passion, which comes with the inspired living. What I have loved even more is that other people are following suit. Happiness and a love for life are contagious. Just realize that everything in life is a choice. Each day is one day that you'll never get back. Be happy. Be passionate. Live inspired!

3. No dream is too big if you're willing to work.

I refuse to tell my student any dream is too big. Why? Because I am one of those people who have big dreams, and I refuse to believe that I will never achieve them. I know I can do what I want if I am willing to work hard enough and completely throw myself into my goals. Dreams are often forgone due to a fear of failure, a lack of will to keep going when one doesn't have immediate success, or a lack of true passion. But, show me a dedicated person who will not take no for an answer when it comes to his/her dreams, and I will put my money on them. Go after everything you want in life. Have no regrets! Because like my friend once told me, no dream is too big if you're willing to work for it.

I am so grateful for my friends at work and my students for making this the most incredible year yet. I am beyond blessed and have learned a lifetime of lessons that I'll always take with me.

Go do great things,

BT

Lessons from the Parentals

I thought I'd head back to life lessons I have learned from the important people in my life. It's time to talk about the two fine individuals who brought me into this world. My parents are two remarkable people who have equipped me with the lessons and tools needed to be a valued member of society. I clearly could write for days about what they've taught me, but I will narrow it down to the three lessons that have stuck with me the most.

Learn from your mistakes

If I had a dollar for every time my father has said this to me, I could easily pay off my student loans. What I love about my dad is that he never was mad at me for making an honest mistake. In fact, he often applauded me for my efforts in going after something. He would tell me that I will make mistakes all of my life, but that I always needed to learn from them. A mistake is only a mistake the first time. Each time after that it is a choice. This little piece of advice has helped me grow into a better person. I am not scared to try new things and have the occasional mishap because I know I will learn what I did wrong and fix it for the next go round. A life that is truly lived will be full of mistakes. Just make sure you listen to my dad and learn from them.

When you get, give

I told my mom once that my personality is all my dad, but my heart is my mom. My mom has always selflessly given all of herself whenever she can, and I think the world would be better off if we all did that more often. She is happiest when she is doing for others, and I find that to be remarkably admirable. When you get the chance, give. It doesn't have to be monetary; it can just be your time. My mom has shown me the importance of removing the mirror that so many people place in front of themselves--the mirror that only reflects back one's own image. She taught me to look out and see others and to constantly ask how I can help them, too. My mom champions for "we" not "me."

Respect

I think the best lesson my parents ever taught me was the importance of respect. From the moment my little brain could comprehend ideas, my parents demanded that I respect everyone. When you see someone you know, go up and say hello. If you don't agree with someone, do not argue. State your feelings (respectfully), and then drop it. When an adult is speaking to you, listen. Treat other's property better than you'd treat your own. Look someone in the eyes when you talk to them. When someone asks you a question, answer them truthfully. It all boils down to respect. Respect gets you further in life, and that is something I can attest to. I can't thank my parents enough for this lesson.

My parents have given me the world. I have never needed anything or wanted anything because they have always been enough. I am who I am because of the lessons from them (and Kenny, who thought he was my parent when I was a kid). My love and respect for them is endless. These lessons have made me into a decent human being, so I would have to recommend them to each of you.

Go do great things,

BT

Daring Greatly

About a year ago, I came across Theodore Roosevelt's speech about the man in the arena. It changed me when I read it, but as I am reading Daring Greatly by Brene Brown, she takes the speech a step further. I just found myself looking up from the book and saying, "Woah." Let's read the Roosevelt speech, and then I am going to go detail what I've learned.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. 

-Theodore Roosevelt

We are afraid of vulnerability, even though it is the purest form of courage. It takes courage to put your neck on the line for a relationship, job, or a dream. It takes courage to be the man in the arena. To be willing to fight in the arena even though there is a overwhelming likelihood you will be knocked down more than once is strength. Like it says, "..if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly..." Don't be afraid to dare greatly. Don't be afraid to fight for your worthy cause. Your life will be greater for being in the arena rather than being the critic sitting in the stands.

The critics in the stands are afraid to be vulnerable. They are afraid to go after something and not achieve their goals, and that is no way to live. They instead would rather rip others for their attempts at the "triumph of high achievement." You should never ever listen to a critic. What do they know? Have they been "marred by dust and sweat and blood?" They have not because they refuse to be vulnerable; they refuse to be strong. Sitting and commenting on other's failures is an act of cowardice. These people need to be forgotten and even prayed for because they, too, need to step into the arena and fight for their worthy cause. 

Here is the great part as detailed by Brene Brown. The people we love and can be vulnerable with (vulnerability takes trust) are not up in the stands. They are not the critics. In fact, she says they are in the arena with us. They are within an arm's length ready to help us back up and to dust us off for the next round.  They are not judging when we are knocked down. They are supporting us with each step of uncertainty because when we go after our worthy cause, each step is a step of blind faith. That's why we are often afraid to go after it. If it was easy, we'd all go after what we wanted. The support we receive steadies the scary steps towards our dreams. The people we love and trust allow us to be vulnerable, which makes us strong and courageous. They allow us to be ourselves and not fear judgement. Love these people with everything you have. Afford them the same gift that they have given you. 

Live your life so that you are able to dare greatly. It is the most important fight you will have in your life. Do not be a critic in the stands. Get into the arena and notice those who follow to help you.

Go do daring things,

BT

Miracle Friend

As you can see from the past two days, I have some great friends who have taught me some of life's most important lessons. Today's person is no exception. I just met Janie this year at school, and I feel like my whole life has changed in that short amount of time. She is everything people want to be all wrapped up and put into one person. While we are not all fortunate enough to have a Janie in our lives, you would be doing yourself a favor to follow the lessons she has taught me. 

If what you're doing is great, let it speak for itself. You don't have to.

I have learned an incredible lesson in humility from Janie. Janie is unarguably one of the most intelligent, hard working, motivated, strong, dedicated, kind, and all around incredible people I know, but she would never tell you that. She has created a program at school that is flourishing and changing kids' lives, but, again, she would never tell you that. She is extremely proud of her program, assistants, and students, but she would rather have the success speak for itself. She doesn't want attention for what she is doing, and I find that to be amazing. We all need a little of that. We need to do our work to the best of our ability because we care, because we are passionate about it, and because it is the right thing to do. We should never do work for attention or accolades. We should not run around praising ourselves because if what we are doing is great enough, the praise will follow all by itself. Janie has taught me that. 

If you want something bad enough and are willing to work for it, you can do anything.

I owe Janie so much more than I could ever give her. This year, she encouraged me to go for my dreams. She didn't just say, "Go for it." She said, "Ok, let's sit down and plan out what you're going to do. You can do this. I believe in you." She told me that over and over again, "I believe in you." From that, I began to really believe that I could actually make a difference and inspire others to help me. Because of her, I have no doubts that if I keep working hard, I can do anything. You all need to believe that, too. If you have an aching passion to do something, you can. You can because it means so much to you that you'll do what you need to achieve it. You just have to move forward with unwavering faith in yourself. You will hit bumps. You will not always get exactly what you want at the time, but you can do anything you put your mind to. I believe that now thanks to Janie. 

Look for the daily miracles and blessings.

One time, at the end of an email, Janie said to me, "I wonder what great things will happen today." It struck me as soon as I read it. There is so much to be said for positivity, and not just that, but for being aware of the great things that happen to us each day. We are too quick to point out the negatives or life's misfortunes that we are neglecting to see all the blessings we receive daily. We are closing ourselves off to happiness if we live like that. Pay attention to each little miracle that happens to you each day. Wake up with the excitement that great things are going to occur. Janie has shown me that you are the one who chooses what you see. Finding the silver lining will lead to a much more fulfilled life. Search for the good and let the bad pass you by. 

Janie is one of the greatest people in the entire world. She is a huge blessing to my life, and I continue to learn from her each day. She has changed who I am and want to be. I am beyond grateful that she has taken me under her wing and inspired me to be more than I thought I could be. I promise these lessons will change you if you let them.

Go be like Janie,

BT

Coop-a-Loop

We all have that one friend. She's that person who you know you can go to to make you laugh. She is the one who brightens a room and everyone is drawn to. That's Cooper. Today, I am going to focus on the important lessons I've learned from my partner-in-crime. I wish everyone was more like her.

"Life loves the liver of it." Maya Angelou

Cooper is quite possibly the happiest and most fun person I've met in my entire life. She loves to smile, laugh, and just have a great time. She doesn't just go through the motions; she lives life. We need to realize that we only get one shot at our lives, so it is important to make the best out of every day. Be silly. Have fun. Make lots of friends. Laugh as much as humanly possible. Enjoy every moment. In doing that, you'll attract others who live in a similar way, which makes life all the better. Don't be someone who whines or complains about every little situation. That's no fun. Change your attitude and find the good in everything. Because of Cooper, I try to always make the most out of every situation. Might as well, right?

Don't worry about things you can't control

B.Coop does not waste her time fretting about issues that are out of her hand. She lives in the moment and only worries about what needs to be. She knows that so much of what bothers us is completely out of our control; therefore, we are wasting our time even thinking about it. I love that about her. Fix what you can. Let the rest go. Your attention needs to be on what you have power over, not what you don't.

Never stop having fun

It does not matter what your age is. You are allowed to have fun no matter what. Just because you hit a certain number doesn't mean you have to be in bed at 6:30 watching reruns of Matlock. It doesn't mean that you can't make friends with the newbie teacher. It doesn't mean that you can't skip down the halls, sing at the top of your lungs to "We Are the World," and dance like you're on the Madonna World tour. Age means nothing. What means something is that you are always enjoying life no matter which birthday you happen to be at. Coop has inspired me to never stop having fun and to always love every second of my life.

When I am hanging out with B.Coop, I know I am going to have the best time. I often laugh until I am afraid my bladder won't be strong enough to take much more. People give us strange looks, but we have decided it's just because they want to join in. (Let us have that, please. Don't argue) What I do know is Cooper has taught me so much, and I wish everyone had a little Cooper in them. Life would be so much more fun.

Go be like Cooper,

BT

Hometown Hero

For the next few nights, I am going to take a break from authors and literary characters to focus on the lessons taught to me by my heroes. Tonight is going to be J.Hunt's night. I have known this incredible woman since the ripe age of 16. She has been through the major ups and downs with me and is the reason I teach. Every morning, I parade down to her office for our morning chats, and each day I find myself more and more excited to see her. She is beyond words. Let's take a look at the most profound lessons from J. Hunt.

"Don't worry about the B+; it adds character."

This was said to me while scheduling classes for my senior year. J.Hunt was looking over my transcript and had come across my first B+. I was distraught. I was embarrassed. I was disappointed. I was quickly trying to explain to her how I was a good student and math was tough for me. She stopped me and said, "Don't worry about the B+; it adds character." I remember looking at her funny because I was completely unsure at the time how in the world a B+ was going to make me a better person. I see the lesson now. Life is not always about being the best and succeeding at everything. There is much to be learned during the times we falter and don't get what we wanted. We learn that we are strong and resilient, and we are able to still be great. Don't let the bumps in life knock you off course. Learn from them, and let them add to your character. 

There are people you can completely trust.

We learn quickly that trust is something that is to be guarded and rarely given. Too often, people share what they aren't supposed to, lie when the truth is wanted, and back stab when we think they care. We then walk around with tower-like walls built up around us in order to protect our hearts. Through J.Hunt, I have learned that there are people who you can completely trust. There are friends who genuinely care and only want the very best for you. They will listen to your deepest secrets and keep them just that...secrets. They want to be there as pillars of support. They want to encourage. They want to celebrate successes. People like J.Hunt prove true friends are out there. You have to #1) search hard #2) go through a few bad ones and #3) be very lucky. :) Protect yourself, but when you find a friend like her, enjoy the gift that they truly are. 

Always be kind...even when it's not deserved.

J. Hunt has shown me through example that even though others can be rude or hurtful, it doesn't mean you have to be. She is always kind, helpful, and respectful to everyone, even those who do not treat her the same. When I watch her do this, I see a quiet strength and poise that I admire more than she knows. Always be the bigger person in the situation. You are not always going to be treated the way you deserve to be treated, but that doesn't mean you have to stoop to that level. You can always choose to be kind. That says more about you. When you can step up and be a good person to those who are not good to you, you prove your strength and integrity. Be like J. Hunt, and just be nice. :)

I have learned countless lessons from her over the past ten years. I am excited to think about all I will learn during the next ten years of our friendship. What I do know is that she is irreplaceable to me, and I don't know where I'd be without her. Remember her lessons because I can promise you that they will come in handy. 

Go do good things,

BT

Miss Maya

I have decided to make the life lesson from people in literature into a miniature series. Today focuses around one of my favorite authors Maya Angelou. I often dream of being in a room with her for an entire day while she showers me with advice and stories about absolutely anything and everything. I find her to be mesmerizing and profound. Let's take a little gander at some of my favorite lessons from. Dr. Maya Angelou. 

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."

This is the easiest way for people to change their lives, but it is the hardest for most to do. Instead of plopping down and whining about a situation, we need to fix it or make the best of it. We only waste time and our happiness by complaining. A little attitude adjustment often goes a long way. Find the good!

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

This can be both a blessing and a curse depending on our impact. Because of the undeniable truth of this quote, make sure that you are always conscious of how you are treating people. Leave a positive impression on those you come in contact with. Make others feel loved, important, encouraged, and believed in. They will never forget that. 

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."

We females have a tendency of giving a million chances or believing that we can change others. We then feel hurt or distraught when someone does something we don't agree with; however, people usually show us who they are right away. If they show you that they have a propensity to lie, believe that they will do that to you. Don't be shocked and dismayed when it happens to you. When you meet someone for the first time and they are sharing others' secrets, don't be shocked when you find out they are sharing yours. It's good to give the benefit of the doubt, but don't be fooled. Don't wait until the 29th time; believe people the first time!

Dr. Maya Angelou is the type of woman we all could learn countless lessons from. Her words inspire me daily. I hope you found some inspiration from them as well. Thanks for taking the time to read this. It means everything to me!

Go do good things,

BT

PS--I am leaving you a video from Oprah who shares her (and my) favorite Maya Angelou lesson. This is doubly exciting for me since Oprah is the one detailing it. 

"When you know better, you do better."

Life lessons from Mr. Finch

Apparently, writer's block is cured on the 6:00 AM drive to work. I was thinking about the greatest character in all of literature. Of all the books I have read, if I had the choice of one character I'd like to meet, Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird (best book ever!) would far and away be my choice. He epitomizes so much of what I want to be like. The following are the three best lessons I've learn from my fictional hero.

#1- "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view - until you climb into his skin and walk around in it."

I wish everyone had this imprinted into his/her brain. Humans have a tendency to prejudge. We make snap judgments about others without knowing the full story because, of course, we "know everything." For example, a few years ago, I had a senior who fell asleep the second he walked into my class. I grew frustrated quickly and called him out into the hall to talk about his "disrespect." It was then I learned that both his parents lost their jobs, and he had been working each week day until 2 AM to help pay the bills for the family. Huge lesson for me. We need to practice empathy over sympathy. 

#2- "The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience."

I was taught at an early age not to follow others "just because." Deep down we know what is right, and we need to follow that even if others aren't. Do what you know is right even if it is the hardest thing to do. 

#3- "I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand.  It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see through it no matter what."

Too often, we are afraid to go after something because of the fear of failure. Life is full of disappointments, but the disappointment should only be tied to the times we don't try. We are capable of so much if we just buckle down and go after it. We often surprise ourselves in the end, and even if we do end up coming up short, there is more to be learned from the journey than from the finish. 

Go do great things,

BT

I Am

I had my 5,983,420th Oprah "Ah-ha" moment this  past weekend. I may have over exaggerated that number slightly, but I am sure it's not too far off. Here is what made me gasp a little: "What ever follows 'I am' follows you."

If we go around saying, "I'm tired," sure enough, we feel even more tired than before. "I am lonely. I am not good enough. I am not pretty." Those statements fly out of our mouths way more than they should. The problem is that those feelings will manifest and latch onto you. When you tell yourself you're aren't something, you start to believe it and will struggle to shake it.

I urge you to change your "I am" statements. Only say things that you wouldn't mind following you. You have to be your own best friend. Your best friend tells you that you're pretty, you can do it, you are special, etc. We all need to start saying that to ourselves. If you have a big project due at work and you're nervous about it, tell yourself, "I am going to do great." Saying, "I am not sure I can do this," will only lead to more and more anxiousness and trepidation. Change "I am tired," to "I can't wait to get my second wind." (Unless it is bed time. Then, by all means, be tired and go to bed.)

I am guilty of this, and I kind of feel like a hypocrite for even saying this to all of you, but I have made a conscious effort to change what I say to and about myself. It has made a huge difference in my overall happiness. You are all so wonderful, unique, and talented. Tell yourself that every day. Make your "I am" positive, and you will find positivity will be right on your heels.

Go do great things,

BT

Haters

I have spent my whole life trying to please everyone. I wanted to be liked by everyone. I wanted everyone to be proud of me. I wanted to make sure I did everything I could to make someone else happy. Basically, I was looking for validation from every single person who I came in contact with, and all I did was set myself up for years of frustration. Even when I did everything I thought I could to make everyone else happy, there were still people who didn't like me or what I was doing. There were times I was completely ripped apart by people even when I did my absolute best.

This used to affect me until I realized that validation is a private not public thing. I care about what the people closest to me think. If my best friend thinks I am not doing a good job at something, that means something to me because she actually knows me. If someone who I don't know all that well and don't care too much about thinks what I am doing is stupid, I can't care about that. Look to your inner circle for the validation or constructive criticism you need. Don't look to strangers.

Someone is always going to have something to say about you, and most of the time it doesn't even have to do with you. They are saying something because of some issue they have with themselves. Tearing someone else down is much easier than looking in the mirror and reflecting upon what you yourself need to change. Don't take that personally. Remember that these people don't really even know you. If they did, then wouldn't be making those comments. While watching OWN, someone said, "People you don't love can't hurt you." That was huge to me. We give people we don't care about power over us. We let them dictate our emotions and feelings about our self worth. If you don't love them, wave their comments away and keep going. People are always going to talk. Let them. They are the ones who will look foolish.

You all have a strong core group of family and friends who love you and only want the best for you. Focus on them for what you need. Don't let the haters in to bring you down. You are capable of so much, and you don't need anyone criticizing you when they do not know who you really are. Keep moving forward because people who gossip or constantly criticize will always stay behind.

Go do great things,

BT

Inspired Beyond Measure

I have nothing profound to share tonight. I just have to write exactly what I am feeling at this moment.

I feel blessed beyond measure. Never in my life have I felt so inspired. I had always been too scared to go after my dreams because who actually dreams of trying to change the world with kindness. That's something one would read about in a book or watch in a Disney film. However, because of the support of great friends, family, and amazing co-teacher, I feel like my students are doing something special. We've made contacts with incredible people around the country, and I see the happiness on the student's faces. As for me, my happiness just radiates everywhere. I can't seem to control it, and that is something I don't mind. :)

I wish I could give this feeling to each and every one of you who read this. If you have a dream, please go for it. Just try. My life has truly never made sense until now. I wake up and go to sleep thinking about ways we can inspire other people to join our mission, and I love every second of it. Find what makes you happy, and go. You won't regret trying; you'll only regret never making an attempt.

What I have found is that inspired people can't help but inspire others. I have been blessed with a new friend this year who doesn't dream; she just does. She sets her sights on a goal, and she makes it happen. She is inspired to make everything she does better than it was. Her work is impeccable, but, most of all, it is done from the heart. She loves what she does and gives her heart and soul to it. After seeing this, I knew that I, too, could be like this. I hope that I have also inspired some students to do the same. It's hard not to want to be more and do more when you watch someone else bask in the happiness of going after a passion.

Find your passion. It can be absolutely anything, but whatever it is, do it. Do it because it makes you happy. Do it because it is your purpose in life. I never knew joy like I feel now. I wish nothing but the very same for each and every one of you. "Life loves the liver of it." Go and live inspired!

Go do great things,

BT